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If you’ve ever spent any time on a shrink’s couch, you’ve probably been asked to unearth all of your relationship demons, like taking out all of your toys from a toy box, and then not knowing how to put them all back, by the time the session is up. I once spent upwards of $200 for an hour for the privilege of fucking up my whole day, when I could have spent $20 for the privilege of fucking the whole day away, thanks to p0rn. P0rn has a great way of exorcising all of your relationship demons, take it from me, every ex-girlfriend, wife, co-worker, and “just friend” of mine is in somewhere my p0rn collection, creaming up around some big dude’s cock and then choking down the cum from his bloated rod. If you’re a professional shrink, then you know just what I am talking about, you overeducated, overpriced wanker. That’s why I’m happy to discover this copy of The Couch. It’s the perfect self-help therapy for the shrink, the shrunk, and even the partially shrunken.
I don't remember how I first heard about Dora Venter and Jazz Duro, but director Steven Angelo and Harmony must be RLD's best kept secret. The flick is a well-filmed, high-end porn flick that rivals Michael Ninn’s work in style, and right out the gate exceeds in intensity. Each scene in the story starts with the gorgeous slim Dora Venter in a great hi-rise office, asking each woman to explain her problem. Because it is European porn, there is a story, but it is definitely American in pacing and intensity, so it is the best of both worlds.
A dyed-black hair Isabel Ice explains to Dora, her shrink, that she has a problem picking up strange men. Perfect! I have a problem too, picking up strange women; I can’t ever do it. In a blink of an eye, we are out the shrink’s office and two big dudes enter a room to find a large lit chest in the middle of a dark room. For a minute, it’s like a D&D scenario, when they find inside the chest is Isabel in fetal position, sleeping or something. I kinda like that the guys help her out and over to the couch where their big pricks are produced and given no hands deep head. Isabel is one of those p0rn girls who just feels like every ex-girlfriend you’ve ever had, a little fleshy, quirky, and less smart than your current girlfriend or wife, but with Jolly Rancher-sized nipples you could suck on all day. Fucking and anal happen, with Ice in the middle getting her man pork servings. Then four fingers stretch open her ass and prep it for the double anal, the first I have ever seen Ice do! Wonderful, candle wax is dripped on her, so you know it’s Euro and more fingers up her bum, ‘til the strokefest onto her chest. Great opener! I’m healed, doc!
It’s two girls for every boy time, with Brit cutie Poppy Morgan and sleek, London blonde Suzie Best. I’m a big fan of these 2 on 1 scenes and this one really delivers the global fuckfest goods. These are two hot girls and they have great heat with each other, by the time the guy joins up and the heat really turns up a notch or two. The girls each get fucked and analed with some lite choking action, which is fine by me. I like the action here esp. between the girls as they get stacked up in double doggie, and share the load between them. Nothing gets wasted here, except your nut into a Kleenex, but then again, you were gonna stroke it off somewhere anyway, so you have no excuse now.
Nikki Sun is another gorgeous, slim platinum Czech blonde getting it from two guys. The camera loves this girl as she gives some awesome head to both of them, stuffing her mouth with their meaty fuck muscles. They really take her body thru its paces as they anal and poon her amidships, like a sawhorse and then move her to anal RCG with some wet slit stroking. DP’s are for everyone and are amazing, making your nature rise, like the Sun. A funny moment happens as the guy pulls out of her ass in doggie and sprays her ass and the guy below, taking creampie off the dessert menu! I am just glad that the bottom guy got out and sprayed her ass too, I may not have been able to move past the moment for quite a while to recover. Maybe I should see a shrink about that. Nah!
Dora Venter and Jazz Duro are a great looking Euro couple, she with green eyes, slim with C cups (probably enhanced) and he with a tan and long hair, doing what I like to do for therapy: stroking off to a p0rn movie, but together. Good thing they found each other cause each one has their own baggage, in the form of toys. Sliver vibrators, glass dildos, buttplugs, and of course a sizeable real cock to provide the release across her face and mouth. Dora is an anal whore and takes all inside her slender ass with the best position being her heads down as this guy rotorooters her anus with a toy then his own dick. There’s simply no rest for the weary as Dora does a bonus interview and clit solo scene.
Well, I'm here to blab it out to the world: This is fucking great shit to stroke to all day, anytime! There, I said it. Hmm, not nearly loud enough. 5 fucking Kleenexes for great variety, energy and camerawork! Take it from the Mastur, self-help doesn’t get any better than this.
Rating:  [5 of 5 Stars!] |
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